Wednesday, March 08, 2006

Cleaning regime

My mother in law is coming to stay for the weekend. This has initiated a full scale RED cleaning alert.

I have 3 levels of cleanliness, classified as follows:

GREEN
Normal everyday acceptability.
Tasks involve: Half hearted tidy up, speedy dust along visible surfaces, hoovering (around the furniture) spray bathroom cleaner around bathroom and rinse off with shower, bung bleach down loo.

AMBER ALERT
Friends visiting - higher level of cleanliness required.
Tasks involve: Tidy up all crap, thorough dusting of surfaces, hoover inc. moving furniture, thorough scrubbing of bath, basin and loo.

RED ALERT
mother-in-law visiting - top level of cleanliness essential
Tasks involve: Clean windows, wash hard floors, hoover with enthusiasm, clean bathroom til shining, including that annoying bit around the bottom and back of the loo, consider cleaning oven (would have to be a red* alert for me to do this) Thorough going over of spare bedroom, bleach all kitchen surfaces, ensure all laundry is put away and not left hanging around on radiators. (handy tip: if you really want to impress your mother in law, leave out the ironing board with some of her sons freshly iron shirts hanging beside.) Stock up fridge with healthy and hearty meal options, ready to fend off the 'is she feeding you properly' criticism.

I have to qualify this by saying that my Mother-in-law is really nice. She would never criticise my housekeeping, and is a very easy guest to have staying. I joked about my mad cleaning spree on the phone last night to her and she said 'oh don't bother, I wouldn't even notice anyway!'

I'm still bothering - you never know...

5 Comments:

Blogger Chris said...

Well, far be it from me to add any further pressure, but it should be noted that when myself Tim and Nick shared a house together, Nick's mum once refused to use the toilet due to the alleged poor cleanliness level.

1:55 PM  
Blogger rach said...

I hate to say it but I may have agreed with her.

...and don't think I've forgotten the horrific state of the bathroom at MH Road when I first started going out with Nick. This is absolutely true: I had to shave off the scum from the bath with a razor blade it was so thick and encrusted.

2:09 PM  
Blogger rach said...

Maybe that should be my next Cleaning top tip!

2:10 PM  
Blogger Chris said...

Just be thankful you never had to deal with the "Troll Hair Monster" that used to live in the plug hole at Bute Street *shudder*.

7:51 PM  
Blogger Nick said...

them were't days.
meh?

9:41 PM  

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