Monday, October 01, 2007

I told you, fuckwittage follows me everywhere...

Nick and I walk into Greggs bakery on Saturday:

Nick: (gesturing to the hot pie counter) What pies have you got?
Bakery girl: (looks blankly) eh?
Nick: (pointing at the large selection of hot pastry goods lined up on the counter) These pies here - what's in them?
Girl: We haven't got any pies.
Nick: What are these?
Girl: They are pasties.
Nick: Right. ok. What pasties have you got?
Girl: ermmm... (looks for help)
Another girl in blue hair net: (points vaguely at pasties) err...chicken...some kind of beans.....
Nick: ....I'll just have 2 sausage rolls please. Sorry if I caused any confusion.


Blogger Christian Briddon said...

I don't think this counts as fuckwittage following you about as you were in Gregs. Every Gregs is a bastion of fuckwits regardless of where you are.

12:49 PM  
Blogger OboeJane said...

It's something about bakeries... when I was at sixth form college, the local bakery was staffed entirely by spectacularly unattractive people - giant hairy warts, outrageous pimplage etc

8:28 PM  
Blogger Tracy said...

You should go to KFC if you like ugly people with low IQ's. Every single time I go in that eaterie (which is not often) I am struck by how thick, and scruffy, and spotty, and yuch they are. Their eyes don't travel in the same direction etc. I think they have a KFC staff breeding farm near to Wath-Upon-Dearne.

8:02 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I did a search for "sausage roll related injuries" and was directed to your blog. Having read all that precedes, the link only now becomes clear. I no longer go in Greggs as the assistants are incredibly rude and friends have described finding pubic hairs in their pasties.
Love the quilts!

11:14 PM  

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